C’mon anyone that owns dogs has had to deal with these. \u00a0Anyone who’s been around dogs has probably been unpleasantly surprised by a bout of dog fart at some point. \u00a0Dog Fart is no laughing matter. \u00a0They are some serious room clearing weapons. \u00a0If they found a way to condense them and bottle them, \u00a0I’m pretty sure they’d be more effective than mace and tear gas.<\/p>\n
Now human farts on the other hand, \u00a0they can be really bad and room clearing, but they are not consistent like dog farts. \u00a0Humans consume a much wider variety of food than dogs. \u00a0Most dogs consume a regular amount of kibble with treats and other goodies mixed in throughout the day.\u00a0 Therefore human farts have more variability than dog farts. \u00a0One thing that puzzles me though, is even when the dogs get into something they’re not supposed to, their farts still smell ridiculously awful.<\/p>\n
Now I have a theory about dog fart that some of you may reject, but I’m gunna throw it out there anyway. \u00a0I believe that dog farts are directional. \u00a0Like little pungent gas arrows that dissipate as they move along their trajectory through the air. \u00a0Human farts are not like this. \u00a0They are more of like a cloud. \u00a0Human gas tends to fill up the room before it fades away, but dogs have a \u00a0way of just shooting that poison right at you, and it doesn’t get better until you walk away from the fart path.<\/p>\n
The only reason I know this is because it happened last week. \u00a0My mom and I were sitting on one side of the room, with the deadly end of a Yuki facing us. \u00a0My sister and her husband on the opposite side of the room, with her sharp potentially flesh ripping fangs pointed toward them (remember fangs capable of ripping flesh and crushing bone< fart end of a dog on the deadly scale). \u00a0Then the\u00a0missile\u00a0fired away. \u00a0My mom and I were left gasping for air as the axis of evil (My sister’s dog Chloe is a German Shepherd from Germany, and I’m pretty sure she was the mastermind of the operation) on the other side just kept watching TV like nothing occurred.<\/p>\n
So there you have it. \u00a0Dog Farts are much more dangerous than Human Farts. \u00a0They are a directional fart though, and escaping their expansion range is possible. \u00a0On the other hand, Human farts are much less predictable when it comes to scent and grandeur, but they do have the ability to fill up a room and linger unlike the dog fart.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
(None of this is scientific)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
C’mon anyone that owns dogs has had to deal with these. \u00a0Anyone who’s been around dogs has probably been unpleasantly surprised by a bout of dog fart at some point. \u00a0Dog Fart is no laughing matter. \u00a0They are some serious room clearing weapons. \u00a0If they found a way to condense them and bottle them, \u00a0I’m […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-225","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-at-home"],"yoast_head":"\n